4/10 – why do I always feel the need to blog whilst sitting in coffee shops. I guess it is the only place where I sit and think for 5 minutes without Olly jumping on my head or me rushing off to the pool. I have had to keep myself busy over the last few weeks to detract what is going on with my life, especially with the unknown work situation. My London Marathon and Ironman training has kept me focused (which I knew it would). My days can be busy with travelling to and from the gym, along with training and taking Olly out. I am fortunate enough to have one amazing dog walker who Olly loves and helps me out massively. I do not frequent coffee shops like I used to, this is not only due to time but also not wanting to. I have not been in the frame of mind. Instead I prefer to have an hour at home with Netflix. I am not quite becoming a series binger (making up my own words) but I have got into Orange is the New Black (why has this not surprised me).
To make my life easier I have purchased a Wattbike for my home gym. Seeing as I can be on this for over an hour at a time 3/4 times per week it helps with my home and dog life. It cost less than my car but more than my road bike but I see it as a worthwhile investment. I can now watch the soaps from the comfort of my home (did I just say that). Olly isn’t too sure about the bike though. He began by sitting and watching the pedals go around. The hypnotising affect sent him into some weird barking frenzy so we have now made an agreement that he sleeps whist I pedal. So far it seems to be working.
My training is back on track after a short break with a sore throat and cough. I did not stop completely but had to drop the intensity. I am grateful to be under the guidance of a great coach who understands me physically and mentally.
When I wrote back on the 5th January, I said that I was going to have EDMR the following day. This was cancelled due to time and rearranged for tomorrow. Last night, however I decided to cancel it. I do not feel that I am in the right place to embrace it at the moment. My lack of emotion regarding therapy would not see it as a positive thing. This week I already have to see the FMA and GP. Just not in the mood. I kind of feel as if I am done with talking and just can’t be bothered. All I want to do is hide myself by swimming a stupid amount of lengths, pedalling a stupid number of miles and running around on the beach with the crazy dog.