*image taken at my local parkrun (Barry Island)
Thursday 9th May 2018 (11.28am)
It has been so long since I last wrote but here I am, back with an update.
On Saturday April 6th I ran my first ultra marathon, 33.5 miles over rugged terrain taking in the beautiful welsh coastal path. A day that I will never forget for many reasons. Friendships made, mental toughness and battles tested to the max as I once again put my body through physical pain to achieve a goal which I put my mind to earlier on in the year.
My plan was to write about the ultra in detail but a day after running I became physically unwell which accounts for my absence from here. I was hit by a virus which rendered me unfit to fly away on holiday. My body feels like it is still recovering as I managed my first run in four weeks on Saturday, followed by one on Monday and a swim today. All were hard and I kick myself in frustration when I think of where I was in terms of my fitness. Unfortunately other negatives then kick in, about my diet and food intake as I feel disgusting with myself as I continue to eat the same volume of food as if I were still in Ironman training.
I do not have a weight problem, I do not having an eating disorder, it is just my natural reaction about myself if I am not training. We all know that exercise is therapy for myself and for lots of you, and no doubt many of you would have been where I am today; out of sport or exercise through injury or illness. Yes its frustrating but at the moment there is nothing that I can do about it, just wait it out and be patient. I will get back to where I was soon enough, my drive and determination will make sure of that.
I have missed my running, cycling and swimming. My routine is up the spout and I have lost my plan and daily direction. I have lost the freedom which I get from being out in the open air, doing what I enjoy. One of the biggest decisions I had to make was to pull out of Newport Marathon last Sunday. I have never had to do this before, but I knew that I had no hope of ever making it to mile 5. Hey, it is not the end of the world having a DNS next to my name, I would rather that than a DNF.
The work situation continues, I am still off on the sick. After being diagnosed with phobic anxiety to the work environment in March by the Police Medical Appeal Board, I am just awaiting treatment for what they have recommended to begin. I am waiting to see a Psychiatrist who will determine if this is practicable.
My life is going through massive change at the moment. I have made two life changing decisions which have given me peace, certainly noticed by myself and those around me. When you put the ball back in your own court, things happen. Things move for the better, you become in control of your life and the outcome.
It feels somewhat ironic that since I changed over my blog name, twitter and instagram to Mind over Marathon Runner that my running has gone downhill 🙄. It is now Saturday 11th May and I clocked up another 5 mile run, including a Parkrun. I am happy to say that I felt better, but far from where I want to be. I have a cycle planned for tomorrow with others so lets see what thats brings.
Ultra buddies – without these two amazing people it would have been a very long day xx